What about those acidic and spiteful remarks?

I believe that the majority of humanity is reactive. I mean this by they happen to be pushed by the current of the world. They react to whatever life throws at them, good or bad. This might not seem as much of a problem... But, what if I told you you could influence the situation you happen to be in?

The fact of the matter is that if we choose to be proactive, we can change our situation. Usually it's as simple as changing your frame of mind. An example, I was always irritated by my baby sister who used to make a great big mess every morning during breakfast. I took the time to look at the situation from a different perspective. A child views the world through a fresh and uncluttered mind. She was actually experiencing the whole 'yummy breakfast' and she was really happy playing with what she was *supposed* to eat. I decided to give her the benefit of the doubt... I even had a short "awww... thats so cute" session.

This is an especially important lesson to be learnt... and APPLIED. I have a friend who is struggling with a life problem now. The world is so big and there is so much to do. It's understandable that my friend is not content to sit still and watch life slip by. Said friend is a real cheerful person, exteremely helpful and has the most generous heart. Lately, a few small petty annoyances would trigger the foulest of moods. It's really painful to watch as my friend's partner has to take most of the abuse.

What happened to my good, cheerful, helpful, etc. friend?

This is specifically for said good friend of mine. If you get the chance to read this, I think it'd be helpful. Then go out and be proactive. Change your situation!

Avoiding Burnout

In some ways it was a typical breakfast meeting. The waitress was pleasant, the eggs were average, and the restaurant was full of busy people. We shared a cup of black, coffee-like substance, and the first few times my client took a sip he managed to spill quite a bit of it. His trembling hand was just one of the symptoms of his burnout.

That’s why we were meeting.

He wanted to know if I could help him. I picked up a fork and explained that as long as I used it for eating, the fork would last indefinitely. However, if I began to use it to drive nails or dig trenches, it would soon break. The key was to use it for what it was designed to do.

The look in his eyes told me he got it, but I still went on to say that people are like the fork. When they do what they are not designed to do, they eventually break.

Sure enough, I had him take his MAPP Assessment and it showed that he was designed to work on projects where there was a definite goal. He derived immense satisfaction from reaching goals. He also needed to work by himself about half the time. He was a scientist and enjoyed lab time, doing calculations, and interpreting test results.

What his job required on a day-to-day basis was another story. His primary task was to supervise a dozen people and maintain operations. No goals. No projects. No time alone. Consequently, his job was sucking the life out of him. Much credit for his recovery goes to his boss who was willing to change the job content to fit the design of a valuable employee.

So how do you know if you, a loved one, or someone who reports to you is suffering from burnout? Here are the early-warning signs.

1. Chronic fatigue - exhaustion, tiredness, a sense of being physically run down

2. Anger at those making demands

3. Self-criticism for putting up with the demands

4. Cynicism, negativity, and irritability

5. A sense of being besieged

6. Exploding easily at seemingly inconsequential things

7. Frequent headaches and gastrointestinal disturbances

8. Weight loss or gain

9. Sleeplessness and depression

10. Shortness of breath

11. Suspiciousness

12. Feelings of helplessness

13. Increased degree of risk taking

Fight burnout. Do what you were designed to do.